Demolition, Deconstruction... Then What?
A Plan for the Mess in the Middle of Transformation in Midlife & Beyond
For those of you who’ve been following me on Facebook or in my group, you know we’ve been having our share of home ownership “adventures” in recent months. A slab leak, a hot water heater break down - combined, they both took out all of the carpet in our house (our kitchen, dining, bathrooms & living areas don’t have carpet). In our master bath, the slab leak repair required tile to be broken and it couldn’t be matched, so we decided to replace all the carpet and that tile with LVP planks…
The day is finally here - and oh what a mess! I know we will love it once it’s done!
Keep reading below….
Life & business is the same way. Right now, I am preparing to launch my signature coaching hybrid program and it’s a mess in the middle trying to bring all the pieces together & then having them all work together. Questioning why it is I do some things the way I do, then realize I can add my own signature to it - and do it my way instead. I know at the other side of this - it’s going to be a beautiful thing that serves my people utilizing my best skills. But this mess in the transition? I have to keep reminding myself it’s worth it.
This is true with any transformation.
Our remodeler crew came in and they have spent the morning doing a lot of things I never would have even considered would need to be done just to lay new LVP flooring! I knew the tile would be demo’d and it would be dusty. (I wasn’t expecting them to forget to put the plastic sheeting over everything we piled in the tub so that will be fun to clean later.) They’ve taken up tile, carpet in bathroom closets as well as our hallway. Then they took all of the baseboards up and grinding the concrete down to prepare the surface. Everything will be even and uniform… a clean canvas awaiting the new makeover.
We have to make the mess to make the breakthrough. - MelAnn
Originally, I expected the planks to be installed over the tile in the bathroom and avoid all the dust; but the remodeler assured me - to keep everything level since we were replacing all of the flooring with the same thing, the tile had to be taken out.
We can make all of the excuses we want to avoid the mess, but sometimes the best way to where it is we desire to be - or achieve desired results - is to swing that sledgehammer, make the mess to make the breakthrough.
Avoiding the mess just alters the outcome. Yes, we can figure out a way to make it work. But it is worth it? All the ways we fall short because we want to navigate around the confrontation? The pain? The mess?
Often the mess we avoid is the mess within. We shy away - or run away - that inward look at the layers of junk life has piled on that hides who we are at our core. We have to peel it away, make the mess, keep what belongs and trash all the rest of why our world has told us to be:
The labels that have been placed upon that either never have applied to us - or did at one time, but no longer do. We also have to consider all of the assumptions and false meanings we attach to those labels, as well. What have we allowed to intertwine with our permanent identity that was meant to be temporary station in life?
Identity Disruptors - when life happens to us. Grief, Loss, Disappointment, Trauma, Seasons of Transition (like Midlife), A diagnosis / illness - or a re-evaluation of one’s faith/deconstruction following hurt or harm done by religious people or doctrine.
It’s time we create our resiliency plan for life. Then confidently show up as who we know ourselves to be at our core - our truest self. Midlife is truly a measure of our resiliency to what life has handed us. We choose how that unfolds for the remainder of our lives.
What will you choose?
Tell me! I’d love to know!
Unapologetically,
MelAnn
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